In the movie Inception, which explores the concept of dreaming in a world where technology allows people to hack into and alter dreams, Leonardo DiCaprio explains a fascinating concept that is part of our everyday lives. He uses a simple circle diagram formed by two curved arrows to describe the mysterious process of dreaming. In this state, we have the ability to both create and perceive the dream. We’re both the game designer and the player—creating the dream and perceiving it without realizing that we are the ones pulling the strings. Even now, the idea that our minds can simultaneously create and consume blows my mind.
This concept of creating and perceiving is something worth contemplating in our waking lives. How often do we face challenges that, when examined closely, turn out to be of our own making—or at least partially the result of our own actions? Do we ever play the victim role and act like we are powerless against a force that we have no power over? Obstacles can often seem like that huge, scary monster of our dreams that we can’t escape. The good news, however, is that, just like it is possible to break through the veil between creator and consumer in our dreams and realize that we are dreaming, so it is possible to break free from the negative perceptions that stop us from making the most of our obstacles.
Here’s an example from my own life. Several years ago, I injured my back during a triathlon. The chronic pain in my lower back persisted for two years, leading me to undergo surgery that, in hindsight, only made things worse—much worse. I was filled with regret. Nights were spent crying myself to sleep, wishing I could turn back time and undo my decision. I talk about this in greater detail on the podcast, but in short, I saw the chronic pain as a devastating trial that I was sure would ruin my career, and ultimately, my life.
But something shifted. During this period, I found meditation. Gradually, I realized that by mentally letting go of the regret and fear surrounding my pain, the physical sensation of pain would actually lessen. In meditation, I came across a number of wise teachers who suggested that obstacles shouldn’t be viewed as purely negative but rather as essential parts of our journey. They encouraged me to ask myself, “What can I learn from this trial?”
I read books that focused on growth through hardship, and slowly, my perception of my “problem” began to change. I started to view it as a source of growth and learning—something actually beneficial to my life. One of the greatest gifts of this painful journey was discovering an anti-inflammatory diet, which I was able to stick with out of sheer necessity. Today, free from pain, I can confidently say that the lessons I found on the dark road of suffering have improved the quality and longevity of my life in ways I never anticipated.
This brings me to the truth in the famous words of Marcus Aurelius: “The impediment to action advances action. What stands in the way becomes the way.” In the case of my back pain, the obstacle became the path that led me to meditation, greater self-love, a healthier lifestyle, and deeper peace amid the chaos. That chronic pain, once a source of dread, eventually motivated me to create something lasting—something that could help others who were walking the same difficult path. At first, the excruciating pain caused me to stew in regret and self-loathing. But as time went on, the pain itself became the key to my growth. As David Goggins said, “Pain unlocks a secret doorway in the mind, one that leads to peak performance and beautiful silence.” The path it created for me was far richer, far more meaningful, than the one I was on before.
So, I ask you: what obstacle are you facing right now? How are you perceiving it? Is it possible that this trial is creating a path that leads to something better? What can you shift in your thinking to begin seeing this challenge as a stepping stone instead of a roadblock?
Action Items:
- Write down your answers to the questions above.
- Read the following books to help deepen your understanding of this topic:
- Can’t Hurt Me by David Goggins
- Man’s Search for Meaning by Viktor Frankl
- The Obstacle is the Way by Ryan Holiday